Saturday afternoon with a call girl

Before you skydive into conclusions, it's important to note that I met her completely by chance. True story. Here goes.

So, It's a Saturday afternoon and I have just had my hair cut at Nick's barbershop when I see this lady approaching. See, Nick can't keep secrets. As soon as he sees the lady approaching his shop, he gives me the lowdown. Apparently she is a call girl. 'Not many people know but I know'. He says it like he got the 411 from a top secret government file.

She is not dressed like your typical call girl. She is in a pink tracksuit. Maybe that's what call girls wear when they are off duty, I don't know.  She is tall, light and has a hoodie over her head. It's only when she pulls it down that I realize that her hair is almost the size of mine. The clean cut look fits her. She looks like the average girl next door. Only prettier. Well, depending on who you live next door to.

She gets in and I realize because of her chosen hairstyle, she is Nick's regular. They talk like old buddies.

I decide to sit there and eavesdrop on the conversation like your proverbial fly on the wall. Then I notice there is an actual fly on the wall. We are now two flies on the wall. Moving on.

I try to figure out how to approach the interview. I decide to just go for it.

I tell her that am writing this blog and would like to chat and maybe feature her thoughts in my next piece. She agrees.
I am now tongue tied because first, I did not expect that she would agree and second, I had not really thought of what to ask her. It's not like I woke up prepared for this. I decide to just wing it.

'So, how do you describe what you do?' I ask.

'Am in the service industry', she replies, without batting an eyelid.

I know she knows I know what she does for a living but I expected a more elaborate answer that I could then pick up the conversation from. She had me outwitted. I ask the first thing that hits my mind.

'Do you feel like what you do is wrong?'

She takes a deep breath, as if in deeper thought and replies, 'No, I don't.'

'Do you go to the streets looking for clients or do they come to you?' I ask hoping for a more detailed answer.

'They come to me', she answers plainly. I have had it. I need more content.

'Look, am still new to this interviewing thing but am so sure this is not how an interview goes. You have to give me something I can work with', I finally confess feeling a bit frustrated by the lack of substance.

'Then you have to ask better questions', she says looking at her watch. I can't say she is impatient. Nick's working on her clean cut so it's not like she can leave. She is probably just used to charging conversations by the minute. I am not paying so I understand.  I press on.

'Do you think that what you do is unfair to your clients' wives or girlfriends?'

'Unfair? how?' She replies.

Am tongue tied again. I neither have a wife nor a girlfriend so I am at a loss. I look at Nick, hoping for an assist. No luck there. I wing it again.

'Because... you know, people are supposed to be faithful. Those guys, they cheat with you. Doesn't that make you feel guilty?' I ask.

'But am not married to them. They are not cheating on me. Their relationship with their wives, girlfriends or pet dogs is none of my business. I can't control my clients', she answers.

I have no idea what to make of that answer. True, it's none of her business. But by being with him, she makes it part of her business. I decide to push that line of thought.

'But don't you think it's part of your business because you come between two people who have decided to live their lives together?' I ask.

'I don't go out there forcing anyone to do anything. They come themselves', she says. ' If I was actively going to seek them and break their relationships then I would be to blame. It's easy to hate on me but the truth is that it's their relationships that they need to fix', she shoots back.

'But can't you just say no?' I ask reluctantly .

'Does no pay the rent? Does no feed me? Boss. Be serious. I just use my talent to earn a living. You know, like Bolt', she answers.

Hold up. I am now confused. Like Bolt?

'Yes, like Bolt. Everyone can run. Not everyone can run like Bolt. Everyone can do what I do. Not everyone can do it like I do', she replies. I can see she's had practice blowing her trumpets. No pun intended.

'But isn't there anything else you could be doing to earn a living? Have you tried beadwork?' I ask.

'Has Bolt ever tried beadwork?' She barks back.

'I don't know but am sure he has hobbies' I reply.

She clicks her tongue and continues, 'I have tried many businesses but this seems to be the one thing that consistently pays bills. I am saving up though. In a few years time, my cargo will start depreciating in value so I have a vision 2030 in place.' She seems to be proud of her long term plan.

'What about kids, a husband?' I ask.

'Why, you want to marry me?' She asks, catching me completely off guard.

'No, not today', I mumble.

'Then don't ask me about it', she hits back and looks away. That must have hit a raw nerve. Am guessing that's the end of that conversation.

Her hair is now done and she stands up to leave. Nick has not said anything the whole time during my conversation with her. He's just been working on her, chewing on his toothpick. I thank her for the chat and tell her that even Bolt can be defeated. She chuckles and walks off. She doesn't pay Nick for the haircut.

As soon as she is out of earshot, Nick and his toothpick turn to me and say, 'don't believe anything you hear from that woman'. 'Why not?', I ask. He turns down the music, looks at me and answers, 'because I was once her client. And I am still paying in haircuts'.

Enjoy your day.